watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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