capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
