Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
