And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize