Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
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Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
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i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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