Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize