I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
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Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
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Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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