Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Sober January is a disaster.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
The feeling are messing with the penis
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
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