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• (586): View more from Michigan

  I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'

  (586): View more from Michigan

  And I thought

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Fuck I do that shit every weekend

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher

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• (631): View more from New York

  So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (408): View more from California

  I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.

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• (585): View more from New York

  we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"

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• 

  These 23 People Share the Worst Advice They’ve Been Given

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  You are the jesus of drinking

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• (435): View more from Utah

  The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?

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