I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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