What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
