hell yes lets make some ravioli
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Randomize