you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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