i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
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