Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
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It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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