the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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