Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
