So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Randomize
