Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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