someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Dignity is for republicans.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.