took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
She announced her abortion via fbk
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
