There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize