FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just blew my weed a kiss
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon