So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
