Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
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Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
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We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly