it wasn't lemon gatorade
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
