trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize