Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
