i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize