Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize