I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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