My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize