I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
