he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
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the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
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And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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