she was so not down for the gang bang
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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