wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize