Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
