She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
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If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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