you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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