Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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