Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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