I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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