if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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