It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
