you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize