So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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