Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT