Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason

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  (847): This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason http://tfl.nu/ngth
  Replies (24) Good night (893) Bad night (1009)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me

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  (248): im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me http://tfl.nu/nrzq
  Replies (10) Good night (1257) Bad night (578)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes

  (847): View more from Illinois

  And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.

  (319): View more from Iowa

  At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.

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  (319): True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes (847): And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me. (319): At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements. http://tfl.nu/k3x0
  Replies (32) Good night (4551) Bad night (715)
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  (916): View more from California

  Michael Bay diarrhea

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  (916): Michael Bay diarrhea http://tfl.nu/1hpz
  Replies (25) Good night (692) Bad night (3935)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for

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  (405): Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for http://tfl.nu/gqdd
  Replies (15) Good night (1346) Bad night (3570)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift

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  (614): the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift http://tfl.nu/dh45
  Replies (19) Good night (4298) Bad night (1342)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here

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  (917): Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here http://tfl.nu/lif5
  Replies (3) Good night (3106) Bad night (670)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.

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  (503): A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money. http://tfl.nu/jqm6
  Replies (4) Good night (2161) Bad night (635)
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  (+33): View more from France

  I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.

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  (+33): I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again. http://tfl.nu/fepp
  Replies (15) Good night (2117) Bad night (700)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.

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  (734): He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge. http://tfl.nu/yr6w
  Replies (4) Good night (657) Bad night (1616)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.

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  (570): Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied. http://tfl.nu/2f2b
  Replies (12) Good night (2673) Bad night (687)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.

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  (919): Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate. http://tfl.nu/d4gp
  Replies (10) Good night (823) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.

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  (817): I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good. http://tfl.nu/zf93
  Replies (2) Good night (1039) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.

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  (724): It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over. http://tfl.nu/5f4b
  Replies (3) Good night (678) Bad night (455)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her

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  (843): Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her http://tfl.nu/v0qt
  Replies (1) Good night (426) Bad night (314)

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