We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
