Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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