DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
